My relationship.
I am not owned. But I am going for it. So where does that leave me? Well, near as I can figure… I am dating Sir and Daddybear. I am their potential boy… which is kind of like being their Fiancé. I am engaged to be owned. Underconsideration for their collar. I don't really worry about the lables. I am theirs, they possess me. WOOHOO! So now that I am back in Boston, I am trying to show Sir and Daddybear how much I want their permanent collar. When I left last week, I don’t think I left the right impression. But as this past week has progressed I found myself more and more agreeable to the idea. Yesterday Sir and Daddybear were in NYC. I had just come off a 14 hour shift, I swung downtown to meet them. I was sort of nervous…I looked like hell after the shift. But that’s a kind of nice thing, they know what I look like all gussied up. Sir was getting a shirt made, So I hung next to Daddybear as Sir spoke with designer. After that Sir and Daddybear took me out to lunch at a local place. They had driven down in a rented car, and offered to take me back with them to Boston. I was so tired that I declined. Daddybear insisted, “You can sleep in the car, we will follow you home, then you will come to Boston.” And it was set. They followed me home, saw my house (from the outside). Saw my home town. I pointed out some places. It’s a nice feeling, but I am watching myself carefully. I want more of it all, but one has to be careful not to anticipate too much. MAL will be important. But I like being here a lot, and I like being with them a lot, and I like the idea of being theirs a lot. They don’t seem to be going anywhere anytime soon…but I am careful with my emotions. So, i use "could be" or "might be" when i could think "will be" or "should be." I am hopefull of the potential, but i am not going to center any life choices around it. But man this collar feels good, and gosh i think i needed it. But it's not just the collar that feels good, it's also the meaning behind it. It's sort of a promise on both ends. by wearing it, i promise to obey and serve. By putting it on me, Sir and Daddybear, promise to protect me. But they want to know me, all of me. That’s a little scary, Sir say’s he can tell when I am about to cum. He also says he will be able to read my body and tell when I can’t take anymore. That’s the point, it’s the bottom’s last line of control. Any top you play with as a bottom doesn’t know what you can take, doesn’t know when you are about to cum. He can’t push you cause he doesn’t know how far you have been before. Sir and Daddybear are going to push me. They know, or they will. Scary. But I welcome it, all of it.
- posted by G @ 4:22 PM